This time, I will write about being prepared when treating children in
everyday situations. A child, whether with or without intellectual disabilities,
has will, emotions, and an inner world as an individual. The foundation
is the same.
We as adults, just need to give more consideration to a child with intellectual
disabilities, because their expressions are weak or indirect.
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When speaking to a child, we always check what they are doing before calling
out their name. A child can almost always hear even if they don’t turn
around or reply. We try to speak to them while being aware of their will,
uncertainties, and anxieties.
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We pay attention not to leave them out of the loop, because they also listen to conversations between adults. We try to speak to them, “It’s 〜, isn’t it?” and let them join the conversation.
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We are careful about physical punishment and not frightening them by speaking
to them. When we need to stop their actions, we hold the whole body to
stop them while speaking to them, instead of suddenly pulling their clothes
from behind or taking them away aggressively.
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When we invite a child to do something, we ask their intention. We see
actions such as not responding, turning their head away, slapping our hand
away, or getting upset as an expression of “NO”. We don’t push a child
to do things and ask them respectfully when needed.
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When we need to tell a child something, we try to show an attitude or expression
that they can be willing to listen to and explain not only with words but
with the real thing, a picture, or a photo as needed.
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When we can’t keep a promise or misunderstand, we apologize properly. |
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When we leave somewhere, because we have to do something or go to the bathroom,
we tell the child so as not to give them cause for anxiety. |
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We pay attention to a child’s gaze and change in facial expression and
try to understand their interests and level of interest. |
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We try to walk shoulder-to-shoulder, instead of walking ahead or following
a child. (Either way, you can’t see their facial expressions!) We put our
hand out instead of grabbing a child’s wrist or pulling their hand unilaterally,
and allow them to hold our hand with trust.
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If we carefully observe a child’s daily behaviors, we can see they are
listening to adult conversations more than we imagine and watching how
we behave. Looking over at us, walking around us, letting out their voice
suddenly in response to our conversation, and going away, etc.… These behaviors
are easily overlooked.
When a child has disabilities or delays in development, we assume that
they don’t understand when we say something. Therefore we often decide
things without them unilaterally or say something to hurt their feelings
without realizing. No matter how good the training or coaching is, we believe
that a child wishes that we, adults rethink our way of understanding and
relating to the child |
Perspective（22） "Being prepared when treating your child"
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